I'm Finally in Love?

Is it really christmas that is coming our way soon? Because I'm feeling the L O V E.. And not the type you can get from your mum;)

I guess February came in a little late for me this year. Yep that is it.

You see, I lost out of touch with a thing called love way.. way back when I was 13. After an end was put to a blissful affair consisting of long cheesy sms trysts and akward face-to-face meetings, that at the moment, I thought was love..

I swore to myself that I will never be that foolish again and that I would be above all this petty rubbish. And so I did.

Only to be THWARTED now..

Scrambled Eggs!

OH how I am infatuated by it. Just pure admiration and lethal love-induced delusions.

I am just under it's control especially when it wears that scarlet thing called ketchup all over her beautiful face. It makes me want to eat her up literally!

....

Oh Scrambles! If you hear me!

I will cherish you till the day my stomach is given the chance to digest you completely. Regardless of the fact you are quite oily.

From now onwards, if you let me, I will love you with each morning that I'll be lucky to live through.

You have to trust me on this.

Forever and always,

Cigs.

I burn and that makes you happy of course
You're not the one that deteriorates to loss
So don't point fingers for the small things I do
Because your ecstasy, it makes me feel small

Lets make one thing a little less smoky
Before I get blown by the winter night's air
All the blame on me is a little undeserved
I'm not bad for you, you are death for me.

Ways I Lost Friends

Weird, sad, unexpected, my fault, his, whatever the reason may be it all ended the same.. one less person to call friend.

let's start shall we.

I lost a friend because (of):

1) A Girl - Simple. We liked the same girl. She can only like one of us. In the end, the girl chose, one guy was the happiest boy in the world, one was cursing the other from the bottom of his bitter heart and a friendship had gone.

2) Body Weight - When you are hanging out with the fat kid at school, it just doesn't do wonders for your popularity. I didn't know what "quality over quantity" meant back then, so I chose to have more "friends".

3) Distance - I'm sure everyone can relate to this. Some friendships aren't just mile-proof. More so if you were 8 and mobiles and emails weren't at your disposal yet.

4) Nothing - People change? They get sick of you? Whatever it is, this is the most cumbersome so far that I have encountered. There's just too many questions. Especially, if he doesn't care to even explain anymore.

5) His Sister - I told him his sister was hot without any malice intended. I got a punch as a reply. Tragic. Well he is Arab. They marry their sexy cousins.

6) Wrong Impressions - You thought he was a "chill" guy, turns out he is a pathological liar. He said he has 5 girls dying over him and a dude, all at the same time. right.

7) I graduated (Primary, that is) - Or I switched schools. Similar to the distance issue, some friends are only friends in certain places. How many "School friends" do you have?

8) Lack of Money - I was on a budget. Wasn't able to keep up with the cost of going to his whereabouts and all his antics. So He looked for a richer guy to hang with.

9) A New Cooler Guy - He started hanging out with the new guy all the time. Everybody likes a shiny new toy right? After that you are just second priority.

10) Danger - I am not the most responsible friend that you will have, that I'll admit. But I thought good friends should stick with each other through highs and lows. This guy chose to take flight the very first sign of it. *puke* Courageous! ;)

Well.

It's true what they say. They come and they go. But some sticks around longer than you expect. Don't take them for granted.

That Big Yellow Junk Left Me

So, here I am near my window, blogging. It is currently 8 20 and from what I remember my school starts at half past 8. I just figured out that I might have missed my bus to school today and I'm not even that smart to make it out sometimes.

But nevertheless, I still haven't gone back to sleep as I'm still hoping that, that Fat Canary of a vehicle would come back for me. Or I hope not, as it just hit me that I didn't do my revision homework for maths. I'm an all-play and no work guy if you haven't noticed yet.

Let's just think of this as God's will for us to catch up. :) (It would be fun if God would always be this generous and thoughtful. Ha!)

Okay, catch up it is. Here goes.

Since I started school this year, there is this restless feeling in me that I can't get rid of. That feeling becomes more intense as I see my teachers. My IQ doesn't pass 100 so I can't figure out the reason as to why as well. So that's that.

Second, My close circle of boys in school started to study now - "It's the last year *R@#n, It'll be shit if we fail... I want to go to Cambridge." and I will go "WTF?!" on their overachieving faces.

This strange occurrence that struck them forced me to study a bit now as there is no any other way to not feel left out.

Third, I am actually happier listening a bit more in class. The day goes by faster you see. I just imagine that, when my physics teacher rubs that polythene rod to demonstrate static electricity, it is something not plastic. Shortly after I LMFAO in my head.

And Lastly, my new math teacher is the combination of the looks of ET and the temper of Satan. (I presume as I haven't met him personally)

I have a hunch that soon enough I will go "delinquent hormonal teenager" on her and I apologize now.

So that's about it. School! Oh but lately, I have been hanging out with older people too.

It kind of boosts my morale as I thought my life was shit till I hear their medley of tragic and sorrow for life stories. God, was I funny to think I knew what messed up means.

One of them even said something that I say to myself a lot now when I call Ms. Life an unfair bitch.

"It's better than nothing."

I love old people.

Till then! Play Nintendo or go back to sleep? Ha! Cheers!

PS- I wish my bus was as cool as The MAGIC School Bus. Travelling down oesophagi is fly yo.

un-Eventful School Days and Me Skipping Joyfully

I got my report card a few weeks back. It basically contains all the great things, or mostly, you can say short comings that I made for the previous school year.

Apparently I was absent, give or take, around 5 weeks all in all. Now that, in my book is definitely not a short coming. Not at all! OH, and I was 9th in class? Not that it matters much.. Ha! 5 Weeeeeeks!

Anyways, today was officially the 3rd day of operation in our school. I am so sad right now as I 'missed' school today. It kills me.

Instead, I was at home, relaxing and watching films while enjoying a plate of meaty bolognaise. So dreadful...

Anyways I hope I dont miss classes tomorrow again. That would just do me such an enormous pain. As..

I just love my school so much.

So as a tribute here are some pichas for you, my friend. Gaze in amazement!



"We keep things pretty organize in our room- We are all about being 'High Class' "

"Talk about a pretty view :)"

"Time Table of Hell : When Do Trannies Get Their Break?" (Look closely)

"We keep each other sane. If they have a chance to talk right now the other one will say "25 dirhams an hour" (You know, RUSSIANS are..) and the other will say "No, I am not Indian!"

And lastly, this is how all the bus rides home look like. Annoying kids (left photo) and my friend and neighbour with the bat-shit crazy face (right).

Till then! It's effing harder than it looks to do photo posts! (Or is it just me?)

P.S. - Header shot is me looking "very sad" missing school today. With some facial mud mask on. LOL (So much for first impressions ei?) ;)

This is the Day!

*yawn*

It's the day alright. The early day.

Once again, for such a long time, i am finally able to wake up before the sun does. Also here I am again looking like I am drowning in my school uniform.

I knew I should've bought a size smaller. Gah.

Eh, fuck it. I'll just be asleep half the day in there anyways.

Just wanted to write before I get all the will sucked out of me later. :)

see you later cool people of the internet. You guys have been a big part of my summer this year and I am very appreciative of that.

OMFG! I'm going to cut this short! I'm running late!

Till then! I'm off! School bus is here.

P.S. - Yeah, school bus. Retardation!

Crime on the Last Day of Teenage Freedom

Yesterday was a pretty cool day. It went just little too fast for my liking actually.

Guess where we dined at. (We pretended to own the place for the night aswell)

Well it's no other place than *da da da da* TACO BELL! The fanciest chain in the whole latin world! Woooh!.

Er, Latin World?! Nevermind me.

So me and my good chums dove our faces on burritos and preteded we were going down on.... yeah. People were staring. We didn't mind as we were too busy sharing our grip techniques. *wink*

So all was well and good. But the show stealer of the night was a random dude.

I didnt know this guy but boy is he a saint in my book now. And to think he just passed by our table and did nothing else.

I'll explain.

As I think most of you now know, I live in Dubai, UAE which is in the lovely, middle east! Naturally, it is a muslim country.

That guy was wearing a shirt.

Sounds pretty innocent, ye? But what's ON his shirt would not gather smiles from A LOT of people here. I assure you.

It read -

"Gay Pride" in rainbow colors. Keyword, RAINBOW.

My mouth went slighlty ajar. No I'm lying! It was wide fucken open in astonishment and disbelief.

Boy was he asking for IT. Brave man! Brave man indeed!

He probably got sent to the slammers before the night ended though. Sad face.
(Consider this story if you think I'm exaggerating on getting jailed here for a shirt.)

Whatever. Salute to the random dude! Wherever he maybe now. Convicted or not convicted, it shall remain a mystery.

Unless he gets into the papers! Wooot! GLAM-O-ROUS!

So that's what little fun I had before I go back to the centre for the obnoxious and slighlty incapacitated in the head youths that is, my school. Let's say this together! YEY for Nahlej!

Till then! I'm ironing my white shirt for tomorrow! *school girl giggles*

Update - Proves I need to go back to school.. It was actually suppose to be spelt as knowledge, not nahlej. Sealy me! ha! I learn something new Evridei.

Typing in the Dark 3

My room is clean again after almost 2 months of piggish hibernation. It's a major part of my "I feel good again" changes.

So now I have been sitting here for awhile. Alone in the dark, in these 4 walls. And still am all smirks. I have been thinking you see.

It feels good.

I realized something aswell.

I'm not going to say that this applies to everybody and everytime but I think it's pretty reasonable enough. That,

Life is only unfair, if you let it be unfair to you.

Sulking is your enemy and so is worrying.

Now I feel foolish because I'm talking all wisey longer than I should be! Ha!

So that's that! No more tirades of sob posts here! OH wait, fuck it!

I'm still going to do that planned weekly whine posts! Lol It's just not me without a bit of whining really! So Cheers!

Till then! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!

No Regrets

I haven't been honest with you guys for the past few weeks.. well just partially you can say.

Today I had let something go. I really enjoyed it. But life being life, it's always enjoyable stuff that usually becomes unhealthy for us.

The thought of summer ending is not the only thing that was dragging me down. It was mostly because of "that". To be honest, I am still hooked up to now but I have to stop before I will be no longer capable of doing so.

After days of pondering, I finally had the will to turn my back and it feels AMAZING! So yeah, NO more looking back!

So I guess, I'm actally looking forward to our school's reopening! I miss waking up early!

Ha! How fast the winds change. See! I am really mental!

Till then! All smiles here!

Impulsive Whining 1

The other day I read a post from a blog that I follow. It was all about being thankful and such and I thought, "This is interesting!" I kind of wanted to do the same aswell.

But there is only one problem. Being me, Soggy, such would be a daunting task. I probably would take a week to think of just a single thing to be thankful about so that kind of wouldn't work because I have to think of another set of things to be thankful about for the week that passed thinking about the previous week's blessings Uh wait... IM Friggin LOST!

Anyways!! I hope you get what I'm saying here.

So staying true to myself, we shall do this the Soggy way! Here's how it will go about..

Instead of thinking about wonderful stuff blah blah blah, I will post things that are bothering me right at the moment I am writing these particular posts! I promise I wont cheat!

So there. Let us start, shall we? 3.. 2.. 1.. and WHINE!

God, why did you gave me such greasy sweaty hands? My keyboard is always oilier than a frying pan!

Geeese Acne breakout again?! That stupid new soap I bought a month ago isn't working anymore!

My elbows are flaking! its pissing me OFF!

My freaking friends are all too "busy" they say! ha. If I know any better, They are BUsy doing nothing! Or maybe, getting their rocks off, alone in their rooms counts as being busy. It makes me fuming angry.

and finally, I guess I need a haircut soon. My head is starting to look like a damned bowl or Zac Efron's! And Im not really keen on him.

whew! Refreshing!

Till then. Keep smiling, yeah?

P.S. - You should try an impulsive whining tirade too! It really did make me feel better. Comment whine for me perhaps? :)

P.P.S - Thats Soap wasnt bought afterall, now that I remember right. I took it from my friends house ROFL (With permission ofcourse!)

Tv Shows Are Cooler Than Me.

I just realized that though I really, really like watching teen drama shows, after each episode, they make me feel like a big pile of shit!

Am I alone on this?

Everytime an episode end with that buff lead getting it on with that hot virginal girl and all ends good, at the other end (thats me, on the couch) is a very different story.

A bitter couch potato I am.

Well you see it just makes me ponder all the action I'm getting with my own "story" you know. Or the lack thereof. No virginal girl anywhere near me but I see a half-empty soda bottle. Get it? Soda bottles are the epitome of a perfect... ah forget it.

*sigh*

But you know what? No matter what, I can't stop tuning in though. The DRAMA is just too gripping. It's kind of a way to escape the mundaness of my life, you can say. So that's that.

Now I'll look at the bright side on this. Anything's better than being that bestfriend of the lead who barely gets attention and gets all the sloppy seconds. Now thats even lamer than me, The "spectator!" Ha! Cheers!

Till then! Gossip girl is about to start!!

P.S.- I don't really watch that show.

Time Doesn't Pass by in Hell, Right?

I am ashamed. Yes.

Again, I have been hididng in a hole for the past few days. No, make that alot of days.

You see, lately I have been extra desperate because I hear school bells ringing.

Ugh, indeed school is almost upon me again. So like a coward I hid from the things I don't want to face. For Goodness sake! I haven't even enrolled for the upcoming year... (should I?)

But you might be wondering, "why hide?"

Well you see I have a theory that, if you don't do anything and just be there, stuck, time wont pass you by so quickly.

And now I know how stupid I really am. So yeah, back to my daily routine, I guess.

Finally! I can shower! I hate greasy hair. ;P

Till then.

And Today's Specialty is..... Nothing!

I was showering this morning. A rare feat nowadays as I am just too lazy to do anything. With that, I am partially kidding.

Anyways, as I was scrubing my bulging pecs (right..), something hit me and I realised... Damn! I'm bleediiing sexy. hawt!

Ha! Okay, so I wasn't serious again. And for the record my body is like hay. What hit me was probably an inevitable question that all of us ask ourselves in some point of time - "Is there anything special about me?" or the more direct "Am I really anything special?"

I know , I know. You can tease me and call me an emo boy right about now but when I asked myself that I didn't have an answer.

Which gave me the answer that I am just mediocre or worse.. common.

I think it is every young person's dream to stand out, be something and all that pooop and sadly, I am one of them. Adults will just tell me that there is nothing wrong with blending in with the rest and being "common" and that everyone is special in their own ways but as of now I can't wrap my head fully around those sayings.

So yeah. Now I'm disappointed as I am but just a plain g33k who blogs, youtubes, plays games and occasionally goes out of his protective shelter. *sigh* awesome! Oh yeah, I'm a cool kid! .......

*sob*

So I guess theres only one solution for this dilemma. I'll probably.. hmm Juggle soap bars with my mouth later? With that I will be trully special! Ha! Or better yet, should I say a "weirdo?" You choose again.

Till then. Guinness Book of Records here I come!!

P.S.- Here are some questions. Have you ever asked yourself those questions? Or are You comfortable with who you are and blah blah? ahhh Please explain! would be nice :D

Best Friends Forever!!

I love my friends. Unfortunately, some don't love me back

Reconnecting with old friends that I haven't seen in awhile is pretty awesome to me. Though, I'm pretty sure, they USUALLY want me to fudge off.

Also, I like helping them out, being of service/ in anyway possible. IN return, it takes a week of nagging in my part for my "can't be arsed" people to comment on this lovely blog. (Ha! yes i force them to visit.)

Well, the other day, a friend took the cake for being the epitome of the things that I am saying.

Whilst I was on FaceBook being jobless like 90% of normal teenagers, I discovered that an old "friend" of mine had an account already. With a little bit of stalking, I found out that she already had my cousin as a friend and didn't even bother to add me.

I was devastated, ofcourse!!

We WERE so close! .... Well in my eyes, we were.

My ego threw a fit, so I did not add her and instead, messaged her first. I thought this would be a great tactic that will prompt her to add me. If only i knew any better.

So read on to watch my lameness in action. Here are the threaded messages.

Soggy: HATE you! NO ADD ME?! friggin despise you now... :(

Chanel: because it's an EXCLUSIVE facebook! only for CLOSE FRIENDS!!! hahahaha!! notice i have like less than 10 friends!

Soggy: ouch. that WAS really hurtful! LIKE WHOA! u r still the same. ur words are like KNIVES! damn.....thats why i love you!! damn miss you!!

Chanel: my words are like knives?? stop being such a drama queen.. i guess youve been practicing because of your blog.. yeah i read it (thanks to RAE (= ) hehe. well, i have to commend you.. it is FUNNY.. in a sort of desperate, like WTF?! way. hahaha! but still, its funny.so i give you credit. haha. and i know you love me.. miss you tooo!! =)

Soggy: ..... n u still havent added me... wow. thanks. get the note, ADD ME!!!

Chanel: im still thinking.. =l

SOggy: wtf?.

Soggy: i need you in my life...

____

at this point, I realised some things.

1) Bitch.. IM still waiting for my request!

2) I have a bitchin ego. why dont i just add her?!

3) My cousin is promowhroing my blog! LMFAO! extra love goes to her!

Anyways so that's that. I hope you guys have better friends than I do.

Well, I guess I'm a bad friend too, if my "friends" don't stick around. There's got to be a reason, yeah? OH well. ill think about that on another day.

Till then. I'll try to message her again. This time, with CAPS on. Ha!

P.S.- That is my Facebook Wall. Feast with your eyes stalkers. ;)

What Pry Ore Ee Tees?

Oh hey there!

(silence......)

You are still reading my blog?
HA! Im flattered you even came back.

I know, I know. It has been awhile since the last post. I want to make a lame excuse so here it goes. I have been very "BUSY."

Oh yes, yes. My blog and you, the reader, are not one of my priorities.... Actually, I really dont have any other things to prioritise. so what the eff.

*sigh* Well, seriously now. Come to think of it, I really don't know what happened for the past couple of days. It seems like time just raced by me. Swwoooosh

Maybe I was just really busy being bored or its really that I am just an untreated amnesiac. You chose.

So that's that. Hope you had a better time than I did for the past week.

Also, just wanted to let you know that I'm hopefully going to update regularly again.

So hold on there. Don't give up on me yet. I'll deliver the yummy gooods soon! I efffing promise!

Okay.. slash the promise. "I'll try" is safer.

Because you are my only friend, so I don't want to lose you... Ha!

Till then, BFF! I'll write for you soon! ;)

They Come, They Go But They Stay.

Today was a bittersweet day.

It was totally fun to finally be out there and have fun with friends after being stuck in a rut for the past few days. Yes, I hibernated.

I do it sometimes. And I pray to God that such a thing is normal for adolescence. Though, I do doubt it , as even I find myself abnormal.

Anywho, I had mixed emotions about today just because it is my last hang out with a couple of my friends for god knows how long. They are leaving this place (I don't blame them) for a place known for black bears, maple syrup and retired old people. Canada.

It's all good and all as I am genuinely happy for them. Starting a "new life" is a pretty exciting idea. Being left behind, on the other hand, is not.

So to commemorate the departure of my lovely friends. We did what should be done.

Grab some yummy, JUICY hotdogs! Throw in a lot of laughs and you get an epic moment that will last for a lifetime.

Afterwards, we did the obligatory walking around in circles, hands on shoulders. It suited the occasion reather well, I must say.

Because you see, friction makes people closer.

I always thought and still do think that leaving people is easier than being left behind. The latter sucks a greater deal. I should know. I left so many people behind in the past. It's easier, really.

I admit, I am bad at keeping in touch. I hate that about me.

One thing is for sure. Even if we grow apart, nothing can take away the times we spent together. Even if I get to lazy to E-mail in the future, I know it and they know it. We will still have each other, in one way or another.

And that idea is JUST Effing AWESOME!

Till then. I am going to tuck in.

Typing in the Dark II

Lately I have been mashing too many buttons.

My fingers are really sore.

That is how I cope with it all.

Because I Didn't Have.. the options.

I Hate Things I Can't See.

Like any normal teenage boy, I watched the harry potter premiere the other day.

After about a couple of hours, I went home a sad muggle.

It's not because of the fact that the film was such a "snog fest."

It is not because the film was centered with Harry sneaking, eaves-dropping and following that BLOND whiny bloke.

And it is definitely NOT because of the group of big-mouthed arab guys behind us that keep jabbering in ARABIC while Ron is tongue-wrestling with a hormonal girl!

What made me most unappreciative of the movie is my own blonde-streaked self! I was basically watching a movie of silhouette and blurry faces. Of all the days to forget my lenses..

Sometimes life literally F***s me, and I bend for it.

Like today, I bought hair dye. All seemed good. I was excited to change up my look.

Until it turned out to be a formula for grey hair. It failed. I was back on all fours.

The moral of the story is Hermione is hot and that you should just really go to a hairdresser for your all hair desires. Be helpful, they need the cash.

Till then. I'm going to have a slumber party.

P.S.- Sorry for the saucepan. I don't have any congruent or clever photo to post. *sulk*

Your Blog is Sexxxi.

"Lazy King, OH LazyKing! You don't know how lovely it feels. It's my second award you hath given me. From the bottom of my heart, I am filled with EFFING glee."

I feel very loved! And now, it is my job to make other humans feel warm and fuzzy inside.. awwwwww

without further BLABBING, here are the people I extend my steamy hot love to.

-Mr. Ferdy of "The Bin Show" (First Blog that I followed and loved)

-Ms. Raz of "We. Don't. Play. Guitars." (I love her rhymes and funny photos! Plus she is very friendly too)

-ABOOBS of "Simply Stupified", just because he is a friend and a neighbour. LMFAO

& last but should've been said first, is YOU! All the people that love and read my blog

Thank you all! You lot make blogging and humiliating myself worth it! :D
LOVe, love, heart, fancy, dig, cherish, Lust for all of you

Till then. I will be waiting for my next award, Lazy! tehee!

Tripped Out of the Closet.

Let me start off by saying, I'm am NOW OFFICIALLY & REGRETTABLY gay!

I say this BECAUSE, after what happened last night, there are no more questions, surely! I just have to be one! ... AHHH!!.. I'm going spastic! OMFG!

Oh dear, merciful God, help me! I am baffled! I didn't mean to do such a thing! It was out of my hands, damn it! I....

I..

I dreamt of FUCKING Robert Pattinson! OMFG. THERE I said it! You can tease and laugh at me now!

What's worse is my days of being straight are ultimately over!! I swear I didn't want it to happen! *sob*

To make it clear, I hate Twilight! I hate blonde vampires and especially I hate, HIM! Oh god... Why couldn't it be just the quirky gal vampire?? FMyLife!

But what does this all really mean?! Is it just my flu? Am I Possessed or hormonal perhaps?? WHAT?! I need freaking answers!

And for the effin record, it wasn't in any way sexual, okay? He just gave me a harmless kiss on the hand. swooooooon! DAMN!

Edward, if you hear me! I CURSE YOU! I hope your fangs rot and your glittery skin itches! You son of a rabis-infected vampire bitch!

.... sigh ....

Till then. I need to find a purple tutu for my new found sexuality. FFS.

P.S. - Twihard fans.. don't start a manhunt for me. I didn't "touch" your R-pats. He touched me! LOL!

Am I On the Right Track?

MY first Writer's block! hip hip hooorah! Awesome.

Today was suppose to be posting day. I already have an idea in my head for days now but somehow can't seem to translate it on words. oh well.

Maybe the fact that my flu is back again doesn't help. GOD, makes me want to hope this is H1N1 and be done with it already. Wait, that means.. no more blogging. I change my mind.

I'll stick with this bad clingy flu.

For now.

till then. I'll hopefully post tomorrow. :D

We are FAMILY!

Whilst I was sick, stuck in my house and ultimately bored. I learnt about something. At the last post, I mentioned how grateful I am to have 16 subscribers (well, i still am thankful) and that made me assume I am that POPULAR already! (sarcasm, yeah? lol)

Well, yesterday matters proved how delusional I am. Sad, as I was already practicing my beauty pageant hand wave. DAMN YOU LIFE, why must you always crush my childish petty dreams!

As I was bored and wasn't really able to blog BLOG, I kind of messed around with the little stuffs that could improve my blog and I happen to stuble upon a feature called "manage your E-mail subscription." Basically, it show all the e-mail address of the lovely people that subscribed to me via mail. The big issue was, somehow, these addresses were familiar. Then it dawned on me. I LOLed hard and that triggered a bout of coughing. haha Good times..... *cough*

MY AUNTS!!!! O M G! MY AUNTS ARE READING MY BLOG! 3 of them! DAMN! SUPPORTIVE! And if it wasn't enough, two of them decided to put two of their e-mails. You know, just in case of malfunctons, yeah?

Okay, so whatever. Subscribers are subscribers, right? Whether it be family or not. That doesn't change the fact that, once I get the chance to strangle my lovely cousin Rae, (Yep, you know it's your fault! lol) I will NOT show mercy. This is my only place where I could curse and biitch about things and you decided to take that away from me! Now, because of you, it's only a matter of time before my mum finds about this "worldly blog." (That's what I assume she will call it) I just shivered.

MUM, if you are reading this. I want to clarify things, I DO eat breakfast and never ever had another girl in my life okay! yeah, like totally! I would never lie to you.... I was just fabricating for entertainment, yeah?

Please don't spank me......

Till then, I have to change my blog url now.

P.S.- Other bloggers out there. Do any of your family members know about your blog? Do you appreciate it? Are they Subscribed to you perhaps? Let me know! Because I seriously feel that I have the most "supportive" family right now. LOL

Siiick but Grateful

Today is a good and at the same time a bad day. It's good because i hit 16 subscribers and 12 followers. Thank you all! (Yes, Im easy to please :) ) I love even numbers you see. This day is also bad because i feel like shiiiiit. Can someone hand me a box of tissue please?

I've got alot to tell you guys as I had a great weekend. But I'm not capable to blog about it as I am very siiiiiick. Gots the bad case of flu, not the swine type though. whew.

Well i knew it was coming anyways. That's what happens when i exert myself too much and do my hysterical retard dance all night!

Anywhooos, How about you guys? How was the weekends for you? It would cheer me up to hear from you about it.

I'm using all my brain power just to make this post. Hope I can share all the recent happenings, as soon as possible. At the mean time, i better go.

Till then, I got an appointment with MR. cough syrup. (blegh)

Typing in the Dark.

It's very late now.

I karaoke'd awhile ago..

Got dragged along by old people.

They made me sing Eric Clapton... scary thing is

I enjoyed it!

GOD! My life is such a living stereotype.

Dubai Is an Awesome Place! But..

...Never go to malls here!

I say that because I feel nauseated everytime I do.

Malls in this country, especially the ones near my place, are full of the people I LOVINGLY refer to as "Glam-entors" (from the words glamorous & Dementors from HarryPot) and "Baked Carrots."

The Glamentors are basically those rich arab women that wears the abaya. The Glam part is they wear the traditional muslim dress ON TOP of designer clothes! HA! WHAT a waste, I say! (Yeah fashion designers would be glad to see their creations under a blanket-y black curtain of a dress)

These superficial women (most of them) are always equipped with their oversized designer bags, which they let dangle on their extended arms, while walking in a very haughty way.

They are very well known for their angry death stares (an expression that they have on their faces most of the time) (Maybe they forgot their afternoon prayer, 'cause they look angry) and can always be seen in a pack with other glamentor BFFs. High end stores are their kitchens.

Then now we move on to the bake carrots. I only dislike them for one reason. They make me PUKE.

These people are the rich euro (Russians... are included minus the rich part) "housewives" who's daily obligations are to sunbathe, get a fake tan on top of their tan and afterwards FREAKING DISPLAY themselves for the general public to see! When did looking like a charred carrot become a fashionable look? The result makes them look like adulterous slags. I see freaking Posh Spice wannabes everywhere! and I'm not happy about it!

I'm all racist towards orange people.. URGh. If they only knew how many desperate asians would die for their pasty skin. (Peace asians! :P) THEN maybe, just maybe they would stop doing such a gross ritual.

So there you have it. Now I am left to shop at road side stores. Not complaining here, at least I'm Far away from such Monstrosities. If my eyes are happy, I'm happy! :)

Till then, I'm gonna catch some sun! (HA!)

Silly Surreal Sarcasm of the Day.

"I am going to hit the gym soon."

Right..Who am I kidding?? Apparently, not even myself. Ha!

Me being physically present in a gym is like waiting for a pig to go anorexic. Barf.

So freaking impossible!

Till then, I have to finish my 5th pushup. Wish me luck!

Have Some Fun!

Sometimes, don't you just get fed up of all the things that you HAVE to do? SO sick, that you just want to, well, have freakin' fun. You know, just chill and do random stuff.

Whether, it's your job or school work that sucks the life out of you, it's so important to go out there, once in awhile and JUST get your head out of everything. I know, I do... ALOT.

Well, okay. I overdo it actually. I admit! All the zombie killing-sprees that I have been doing on Left4Dead is taking a toll on my poor poor eyes. I'll probably go blind when I hit my late 30s.

Anyways, the point of this lame entry is that, I just wanted to share a video to you guys. It epitomises what I just said. F-U-N! Plus the music is just class too!

I just can't freaking resist black and white clips!


(Thanks to Nanie for the link!)

I just noticed that I use "just" alot. You think it's just okay? Well I can JUSTify myself if you argue!

Do tell me if you like the epic vid!

Till then! I'm off to have some fun. ;)

Confucius' Long Lost Philosopy #2

Master said "Add yellow to white and you get opulent result"

Translation: Rich asians = White people's partners

"Yoko Ono."

*That's it, this old racist chink lunatic is going to get it!*

Why the Hell Would He Die Like This?!

Death is inevitable. Unavoidable. That's why I have always given thought to my own.
In my imagination, I would be sitting on a chair.

Lifeless. Naked. My "family jewels" exposed and..
an adult magazine at the side. Preferably Hustler. - It's classier.

That's how I envisioned my future loser-ific virginal death would be. Very tame, yeah?

What I don't understand though is, why can't celebrities just freaking die simple boring deaths like normal people do?

By now, I know all of you have heard about Michael Jackson's passing away.

First of all let me just say, bless his black/white soul. May he rest in peace and not be disturbed by the endless THRILLER songs that will be played in the upcoming days. Or else, he just MIGHT do a real thriller upon us.

Damn, I hope not. *shivers* Dancing zombies are NOT my thing.

Early claims on his death said he died of cardiac arrest. Tragic, but not uncommon, so it's pretty understandable. Here's where his celebrity status comes in to play. Now, new speculations are surfacing that there might be drug-overdosing involved and that someone manipulated him into doing so.

See what I mean. It's like a freaking movie scene! If that would have been a normal person would they think he has been subjected to foul-play aswell?

It is always like, who drugged who? Who shot who? Who Piped who? Their deaths become like a real life game of Cluedo!

"I suggest it was Mrs. White, in Michael's bedroom, with the bag of cocaine" (Ha!)
(People who haven't played Clue/Cluedo won't get this. I suggest you click the link)

But come to think of it, HE is FREAKING MJ man! RESPECT dawg. (oh wait.. he's not a rapper.) I guess it's just reasonable to double check. So if there is foul-play involved, we can "BEAT IT". uhmm, The suspect I mean!

I just hope this whole ordeal will just end soon. Not just for my sake (So I can finally hear non-mj news) but for Michael's family aswell. So they can mourn in peace already.

So I guess this is it. MY Tribute to the King of Pop! RIP!

Till then, I am downloading a Jackson 5 album.

How to Not Play Tennis.

Today, I woke up at 2 p.m.
I did my usual daily on-line routine. That is, to check facebook, subscriptions in youtube and so on. Typical bored teenager stuff.

What I failed to remember was I had freaking tennis class at 4. By the time I realized it, it was already 3 30. To make matters worse, I noticed that I haven't eaten anything yet. JUST GREAT. I thought I could pull it through up until the end of the class. Damn was I wrong.

I felt like I was going to faint just after the first set. I was hyperventilating aggressively but It doesn't mean my performance was affected though.
I still suck, just as usual. I was beaten by a 12 year old.. again. It does wonders for my EGO.

After all was swung and smashed, I decided to finally have my breakfast-dinner for the day. Went to McDonalds and grabbed a McArabia. A burger-type thing that tastes like soup. Hmmm YUM. I was devouring my food happily, when I saw this plump Arab man sleeping at the table in front of me. No he wasn't a vagrant but he did look real wasted and creepy.

I thought to myself, how classy can this guy be. I only wish to sleep in a restaurant as carefree as he did. In my mind, I LOLed. Because though I always lose to a kid in tennis, I'm not the only loser around. I got Mr. I-sleep-at-fastfood-chains to make me feel like a winner.

He made my day. I went home a cool guy :)

Till then. I have to shower now, I smell very Russian.
Pee-you!

MY Music Obsession of the Week.

Her name is Sia Furler. An Australian singer.

AND yes she looks bonkers. That's why I like her.

She probably likes eggs and bacon for her afternoon snack too.

Well, the other day I was at the town mall. I was looking around at the record shop and happened to stuble upon her bat-shit crazy cover art.

My "retard senses" tingled violently. I didn't know if her music would be worthwhile, but looking as nutty as that, I couldn't resist..

So BEING the pirate that I am, I went home, online and borrowed her album. (Yes, I like to put it that way) I gave her record a spin and then let's just say I almost forgot what ensued next. It gave me multiple eargasms! Ahhhhh!.... Her voice was like a dream. Swwwooosh.

It ended. Then I was awake again. A happy conscious guy, I was. What I hated though was having to clean up my moist ears afterwards. Clean up is such a bitch.

Therefore here's my conclusion, sometimes people should cut nutty-looking people (including me) some slack. Even that hobo you see around town. Befriend the guy! He just might be a singer with a smashing record you know..

but uhm, do be careful (Ha!)

Till then. I have to cook chicken franks now.

P.S. - Day Too Soon is my favorite track. Lalalala..

I Would Rather Be Called Ugly!

That's right. And I'm not just saying that for the sake of saying it. I FREAKING MEAN it.

I'll cut to the chase and be straightforward. I AM SICK OF BEING CALLED CUTE!!

At first, when a particular girl says that I'm cute, that's alright. I mean, that's VERY good. It means she's interested in one way or another. But then if she calls ME adorable EVERY single time, that's just a major catastrophe.

I mean c'mon girls, get a clue. I'm trying to be all hunky and sexy(HA! as if that's possible) when I'm around you lot and you go blurt out "OMG, You are just the cutest!! YOU WANT A HUG!!?"

No, thank you very much. I want your panties. No "LOL's" here. I WANT THEM. Hand them over, now.

Cuteness can only get you so far, but the end of the day, don't we all want to get laid? (OH cmon! you there, stop saying "ewww!" Hypocrite)

Teddy bears are cute. Kittens are cute. That old woman from around my neighborhood is cute(with her dentures on). I don't see them getting action, but they are cute, aren't they? See what I mean.

God, now I'm just worrying if I can pass on my LOVELY genes in the future. If this "cuteness" curse continues, I am DOOMED.

So please, just tell me I'm UGLY ..

but call me, okay? * sexy wink*

****

DO you hate something that a bunch of people call you all the time? Would you rather be called UGLY than that word? If so SHARE IT with me through the comments! :D

Till then, UGLY!

How Black African People Survive.

Let me just start this post by saying I was inspired by my blogger friends' racial posts. (apparently, this kind of posts is a big traffic magnet)

So I chose the african people to target. I imagined all these crazy things in my head that keeps them alive, atleast in my head.

So without further ado. My first racist POST (Ha!)

1) A Black man can still provide shelter for his family,
with his BONER. Instant tent for the whole lot.

2) That also means HIS wife doesn't go hungry. hmmmm.. Protein.

3) (Fact) Watermelons originated in Africa.(End of fact) That's why they survive, enough said.

4) It's true. They are all olympic runners.
If not, how the hell will they survive all those lions?

5) If single men needs to "release tension," they don't need to pay for prostitutes.
They have monkeys.

6)No roads, means no cars, means no run-overs, means NO dead people.

7) They don't get crazy lunatic immigrants like that asian dude from the virginia tech. debacle.
I mean who would really want to migrate there anyways.

(Oops, is it too early to make a joke about that? GET OVER IT)

8)They await their next human sacrifice for their Gods. But that also means their next meal. Never waste any (possible) food, as we all say.

9) They don't have rappers there. Hence, no shootings and gang wars.


With all these said reasons. A lot of people still think they are helpless and vulnerable. I say BULL! Some people are just too helpful for their own good.

So that's why we now come to the last reason.

10) They FREAKING get help from organizations from around the globe!

As if they are not doing well on their own already.

****

Do you think I forgot other ways in which the african people survive?

Do tell me through comments? WAAAATTTEEEERMELON!

Till then.

I'm Officially Here! (Revamped!)

HOORAH! Just finished the new design of my blog! :D

What do you think?! Isn't it fancy? Don't you just love eggs?! I did hours and hours of hard work for this, so you better find it good!

The reason for the change is primarily because the previous template didn't really reflect accurately what my blog was all about.

But most importantly, this change symbolises the definite presence of my blog for the long run!

I had to feel around and finally got the flow of things and blogging and I'm ecstatic to say I'm here to stay! That just means that I will make better posts from hereinafter. Hopefully that is!

As long as you guys will keep coming back, I will do just that!

Till then! HAPPY FACE!

Confucius' Long Lost Philosopy

The Master said: " Ones with punier eyes are the ones who wield shorter sword."

Translation: chinkier eyes = smaller weener

I just shot my self on the foot. Genius..

How to Be Emo, Effectively.

Here's MY guideline to be EMO successfully.

1) Never have Lady Gaga in your music collection. Stick to MCR and their teenage propaganda bull songs.

NO matter how catchy that bitch's tunes are, stand you ground. Resist her sexy po-po-po-poker FACE.

2) DOn't be Russian.

You will be too blonde for your own good.

3) A compass and a blade should be your best friends.

IF you don't get along with them, and think they are too HURTFUL. Get a red pen.

4) Never chat with people..

unless the topic is about death, loneliness or that drag queen guy from TOKIO HOTEL.

5) Always say "No one understands me!" when people argue with you.

After you say that, walk out of the room and cry.

6) BOMBARD the interweb with black-clothed and "guy liner-ed" pictures of yourself.

Don't forget your signature POUT in all those photos. POUT more!

7) Eat less often.

Nothing says you want to DIE more than visible bones right?

8) THe more eyes you cover, the better.

No self-respecting emo person will let others see through the windows of his soul.

9) Be Gay!

No, NOT happy ofcourse! We are talking girl jeans and make up.

and Lastly

10) Write a better self-destructive and angry poem than this:

"I never thought life would be,
so much pain and misery.
I just dont believe in anybody
anymore .
Why should my deepest aim
just go in vain.
Whenever I see you,
whenever I feel you.
My heart goes tearing apart
as if satan plays his gothic art
to ever and after love you more than anyone I've ever known"

by I'm-So-EuropeAnonymous.

(MY emo-wannabe FRIEND will kill me now XD)

Follow these rules and you will lead a prosperous LONELY life :)

Till then.

P.S. - Do cuts vertically rather than horizontally. It's more lethal! WORD.

You Are (not) Here, That's Why I Love You!

Today, I got out of my bed in a bad mood. Even worse than usual.

I must have woken up at the effin f-ed up side of the bed because I'm freaking murdering my keyboard right now. ( I know I'll be sorry for this soon enough.)

It must have been the thing that I was giving thought to before I slept last night..

Hmm.. Meh. I didn't sleep that early. It must have been nearly dawn when I got to shut my eyes to snooze.

The thing is I got one of those stupid epiphanies that you know you are better off not realizing. (Like when I look at the mirror, and see a geekasaurus... I cry)

I reflected on it and found out something.

My mum loves me..
out of her sight! *black girl finger snaps*

I'll demonstrate it.

*Cue Avril Lavigne songs!*

You see, my mother doesn't talk to me when I'm at home. Well she doesn't seem to talk to me that much wherever we are actually.

Oh god.. I don't want to cry now..
(I hope you detected the sarcasm.)

I tried to recount all the times, she said "I love you" to me in my whole lifetime and that took me about half a minute.

It dawned on me, that my mum mostly said those three words to me, through the FREAKing phone.

And when I say she said "I love you", by that I mean she mumbled.. "lvyou.."

Go figure... She had sore throat.

Let us move on to another case of the same circumstances. This time though it's about lovers.

In my case, a past lover. (pshh I don't miss her!... uhm, yeah.)

She appeared cold to me when we used to get together. Basically, just when I'm in plain sight really.
(It is safe to say that nothing happened between us. Though I wished th.. Nevermind.)

Chats and Texts with her is a different story though. She was the best! She compliments and flatters me the whole time. Just like me sucking up to my (beautiful.. *barf*) math teacher, as the final exams were fast approaching.

I don't know but maybe SHE was just a freak. It's totally not ME, it was her. *sigh* I totally make bad choices with girls sometimes.

Well she had nice eyes though. Too bad..

I wonder, is it just me or do you relate on this bizarre matter aswell?

I mean, why would other people make their love for us known when we are freaking not around them?

Is it stupidity, shame or what?

If it is shame, then, I understand my mum now.
Yeah, just have me as a son.. See if you won't be humiliated.

Love has just too much complications. It freaking pisses me off.

THANK GOODNESS for hate then! It's so much more flexible and easy, yeah?

People hate on people face to face, usually. It's true! I get random people bitching on my 8 year old face everytime.

And as for distant hating, just ask your backstabbing bitter "friend." He will tell you all about loathing.. coward style!

So that is what's on my mind recently.
Don't dwell on it too hard, I say.

You can never take an angry famished guy too seriously.

Till then,
I'm off to the bank.

Depressing Happy Places!

A huge counteraction of a phrase.. but as they say, shit happens.

SO do living contradictions. Such a tragedy, yeah?

Just ask a friend of mine.

He said, he is a very carefree person. Take note, carefree, like birds (with the exception of chickens, they have alot to worry about). Not a worry in the world. But he quickly follows the statement by saying, he always WEIGH things out..

Oooh That MADE a lot of sense! Bravo!

Yep, I got Russians for friends.

The thing that takes the cake though, the number one self-opposing word in the world would be... *drum roll*

MILFs

Yes, you read that right. (All prude goody two-shoes should SUCK it up now.)

I don't care if your mom has freaking brazilian legs for limbs, the freaking himalayas for a chest or my entire supply of marshmallow in her trunk.. She can never be hot!

Come on. Mothers should never make anyone horny! Aside from your bald father.

Sorry to break a lot of guys' dreams but all those self-proclaimed M I L F's in the videos they have been watching recently.. they are just lonely old hags. Yes, they never had kids, they just look like they have a dozen. HA! With all the nasty ******* they have been *insert alternative soda-drinking verb here*, ofcourse!

Hmm.. I wandered too far away from my title now. *sigh* GEnius!

I'll make this quick now.

You know those freaking arcades filled with third-world video machines? Freakin' ate em!

I know they were made to spark joy in the hearts of the jobless boys of the past, but seriously, my grandpa is long dead.

They are just depressing now, too outdated to make anyone smile. I think.

So yeah, that's just what I was gonna talk about originally. Good thing that MILF topic came up.

Ofcourse, I'm not exactly overflowing with ideas here. That just doesn't happen to me.

You should know why. I woke up at noon today.

And right, I didn't have...

again.

*ended the blog while listening to "Venus As a Boy" - Bjork, freaking coincidence much..*

I Eat Cereals for Lunch.

I really do. I simply don't do breakfast.

Missing breakfast, for me, is totally like having breakfast for other normal people.

No, I'm not saying I'm not normal (Well this can be questionable at times..) and yes, other people might find it weird. Though I surely don't.

You clearly don't have a choice when you have to be ready for school when the bus picks you up at an ungodly hour. We are talking as early as 6 a.m. here buddy. Top that.

Summers? hmmmm..

You know it. I even miss lunch sometimes.

With that said, it is safe to say..

I'm a twink.

Scrawnier than a pre-pubescent 12 year old. (Ha! You should have seen me when I was 12. It looked like I was born yesterday)

That's not the only consequence that comes with my adapted habit though.

I feel dumber.

Yes, i feel stupid. Not able to reach my full intellectual capacity.

Thank God I do though because this one actually helps!

You see not all consequences are bad. Right?

Look, it is a fact(ha!) people who chow down on their morning meals act smarter and say more factual things. (Most of the time okay.. excluding inbreds and lunes ofcourse)

At the same time, they are more disagreeable.

Why you ask? Simple!

They have more energy to disagree with you and correct your every mistake. Ergo, these people are more aware of themselves and the situations that are happening that they tend to be more uptight and prim. Complete tragic a-holes, those early munchers are. (Yes, teachers always have heavy breakfasts)

We, on the other hand, are so f-ing out of it and emaciated, we shit talk through out the day. Random vapid conversation is our specialty and apparently that is attractive. Well at least, at the area I'm living at right now. People dig you for chanting non-sense! Heck yeah!

I can go like .."Can I touch your hair? I'll give you a coookkiiiiee!.. WHORE!" and I'll get a reply going.. "OMG! You are so cute! Go on, touch it!"

uhmm.. Okay so it's not really that scary crazy but we do something close to that here. Yes, word!

So I say, drop that spoon next time. If you are ready to please or decided to finally gain some friends.

A-holes and nerds keep eating.

.......

DAMN! Where are my manners?! This is my first post. I didn't mean to blab that long without an introduction.

Well, atleast now you know what to expect from future posts at this blog.

Class subjects to stimulate your brain. (HA! right!)

But I didn't eat breakfast, so don't take my words for it.

Till then.